This weekend I finished a book that was quite inspirational and moving. In some ways, it reminded me of my friend, although her situation hadn't been quite as drastic as the author of this book. It was a memoir of a woman who is now about my age who grew up in New York in the 1980's in an absolutely deplorable situation. Her parents were heavily addicted to drugs and alcohol and she spent most of her childhood truant from school, hungry, and eventually homeless at the age of 15. She lived on the streets for several years and at the age of 17 had one high school credit. She had never in her life attended school consistently and had had no desire to do so. However at some point, the author found some motivation within herself to change the direction of her life and decided to go back to high school. After much searching and being turned away multiple times, she was accepted into an alternative high school, although she was still homeless. She didn't want anyone to know she was was homeless because she had spent a brief time in a group home and had determined that she would rather be on the streets than experience that again. (Meanwhile, her mother died of AIDS and her father ended up in a men's shelter, also HIV positive). Within 2 years, she caught up on all her credits and was able to graduate high school. She ended up receiving a New York Times scholarship and was eventually accepted to Harvard University, where she graduated in 2009.
Yes, I must admit I was quite misty-eyed by the time I reached the end of the book and completely inspired by this woman who overcame pretty much the most heart-breaking childhood anyone could imagine...with really very little guidance or support until she got connected at the alternative high school. Her resilience, her ability to keep going, her ability to set a goal and envision a different life for herself was amazing. This kind of self-determination is rare, but I saw it in my friend from Baylor....I see it in my former student Dezeray (who I talk about all the time)...and then there are others that perhaps I don't see it yet, but it's there. All we have to do is help them uncover it...give them a direction to take it. As educators, we can never assume that a kid isn't capable of this kind of story. Many times in her search to return to school, the author was turned away because she was too far behind, had a history of truancy, a troubled past. She wasn't "worth" the risk, worth investing in....yet because someone gave her one more chance she ended up at the most prestigious university in America. Every single day in my work in education, a kid surprises me. Every day. We tend to get jaded, disillusioned, disenchanted....yet we have to be careful to never assume a kid is "too far gone". Somewhere behind all the baggage, bad choices, abuse, neglect, lack of opportunity, whatever the case may be...somewhere behind all of that, there are kids who have something else. A mental toughness. A determination to change the trajectory of his or her life. A willingness to finish what is started. It is up to us to expect that out of every kid because we just never know who is capable of Harvard or Baylor or beyond.
